Mrs Mills got me thinking

I don’t feel any embarrassment at admitting that I watched, and enjoyed, BBC4’s documentary on Mrs Mills earlier this week.

Who? Mrs Mills. Anyone who lived in Britain in the 60s and 70s will remember her as a fixture on TV and the record racks of Woolworth’s, a jolly, middle aged housewife who used to knock out party tunes on the piano, and sold a respectable amount of records. She probably outsold a bunch of rock bands that have picked up an iconic status in recent years.

It’s not that I particularly appreciated the music. She was a good pub pianist, skilled enough to play some decent ragtime, but specialised in the old music hall sing-alongs that give me an earache. But I enjoyed the programme for the usual bout of nostalgia for what I remember from my early years. There were clips of her on Morecambe & Wise and the Billy Cotton Band Show, several minutes devoted to her album covers, and a lot of old film of people having boozy sing-songs in smoky pubs.

I was giving in to nostalgia, and realised that it doesn’t necessarily involve wallowing in stuff that you enjoyed at the time. To me, Mrs Mills was someone who kept old people amused, and I’ve got no interest in listening to her records, no matter how skilful she may have been on the ivories. Nostalgia is being reminded of stuff that was there, whether you enjoyed it or not, and making your own associations – in this case family parties, people who would sing with a fag on their lips, women drinking Babycham, appalling hairstyles, clothes that a charity shop would now refuse, and the TV shows that kept me amused as a six year old.

That’s why in the past I’ve enjoyed documentaries on the Carpenters, who made me yawn, the Osmonds, who I detested in my teens, and Max Bygraves, whose ability to sell shedloads of LPs in the 70s was a major irritant to us self-righteous music fans. It’s fun to be watch snippets of the past, even if you didn’t enjoy it at the time.

Now I’m waiting for BBC4 to broadcast a programme on Pinky and Perky.

Corporate vandalism on Tower Bridge

Maybe I’ve missed it before, but last night I noticed that Tower Bridge has been vandalised. Looking downriver from Hays Galleria I saw that two company logos, EDF Energy and GE, have been beamed onto its towers.

It prompted a check on Google this morning, and sight of an old press release that the company swung a deal with the mayor and the Corporation of London on a lighting system for the bridge. OK, so it’s no cost to the taxpayer, but it’s still an act of vandalism.

Tower Bridge is an icon, a representation of the fantastic engineering feats of Britain in the 19^th century, and a grand, slightly wacko demonstration of the architectural excess that characterised the age. It’s one of the defining images of London, a sight that makes its residents proud and impresses people from around the world. And now it’s been turned into an advertising hoarding.

It’s a step in the corporatisation of public space that desecrates the urban landscape. Any sight can be sucked into a corporate marketing campaign, and subsequently loses that sense that it is something special. When you’re ready to put a price on a public treasure, then you’re ready to cheapen it.

Tower Bridge is still a great sight during the day; but now it’s less impressive than it should be at night.

A few thoughts on the Olympics

OK, so it all turned much better than some of us expected. The past couple of weeks have been one big round of cheering, waving the flag and feeling proud about the success of the Olympics – even if the ticketing was still a mess until the end of the Games.

For what it’s worth, a few thoughts on why it all turned out so well:

-          Danny Boyle’s opening ceremony. It might have had a lot of people confused, but it was fun to watch and reminded us of the NHS, something in which most Brits, with the exception of the more rabid Tories, are genuinely proud. The nod to Empire Windrush was good as well.

-          The two week gridlock we were told to expect for London didn’t materialise. In fact, it seemed quite easy to get about most of the time. So people didn’t have to go through a lot of aggro to get to and from work.

-          The trademark police dropped the heavy handed bullying of anyone unauthorised using the Olympic logo. Would have been even better if they had shown more tact in the run-up to the Games.

-          The BBC did a terrific job of covering as much as possible, even the less popular events. Despite ropey commentating on some events, asking John McEnroe to comment on sports about which he knows nothing, and showing David Beckham in the stands at every opportunity, overall it made it a great experience.

-          All the volunteers. They were helpful, they smiled a lot. Not very British, but good on them.

-          It kept all the politicians out of the news for two weeks. Well nearly, but it’s been pretty easy to forget out them for a while.

-          All those medals won by Team GB. Be honest, it makes a difference.

-          All the efforts made by competitors in every sport. Even the dancing horses. They devote years of preparation to this, and even those come in last are awesome.

There have been some stories in the media that lots of people are ready to sustain the mood through the Paralympics. I hope so, and not just because we’ve got tickets.

Mark Say's collection of fiction, Perversities of Faith, is available on amazon.co.uk and amazon.com. Also check out marksaywriter.com.

Positive patriotism at the Olympics

As one of those who was annoyed by the authoritarian build-up to the Olympics, I’ll happily admit that the Games have themselves have been a terrific experience. It’s brought out something good in us Brits that shows that we can put on a show and celebrate the good things when the time is right.

One of the best things has been the expressions of patriotism that have taken pleasure in our competitors’ achievement while not playing down those from overseas. It’s inevitable that our broadcasters will focus on the British team – any country in the world will make a fuss of its own – and we’re entitled to the flag waving when our men and women bring home a medal. But it’s they have also been ready to wave it for the others who come out on top.

When Rebecca Adlington picked up bronze instead of the expected gold in the 800 metres freestyle, the BBC commentators shared the disappointment but were still in awe of the winning performance by Katie Ledecky. It shared the heartbreak of Zac Purchase and Mark Hunter when they lost the double skulls on the last few strokes, but paid credit to a storming finish by the Danish pair of Mads Rasmussen and Rasmus Quist.

The crowds have also got into the right spirit. You’ve only got to look at how they applauded Michael Phelps in the pool, or the roar they gave Tirunesh Dibaba when she stormed the last 500 metres in the women’s 10,000. They’ve been ready to cheer great performances wherever they come from. And this morning I was part of the crowd watching the women’s marathon as they cheered every runner from every country on all three laps.

Britain’s prone to mixing up patriotism with a mean minded nationalism that takes the attitude that we’re a cut above most foreigners, but thankfully it hasn’t been like at these Olympics. We’re seeing a good patriotism.

Mark Say's collection of fiction, Perversities of Faith, is available on amazon.co.uk and amazon.com. Also check out marksaywriter.com.

The odd effect of watching the Olympics

Having the Olympics in London is having an odd effect.

I've been sceptical about the Games, sharing the irritation at the prospect of traffic jams, clogged public transport, the fact that hardly anyone I know obtained tickets, the bullying on behalf of sponsors and over-the-top security. A couple of things yesterday added to it: seeing all those empty seats in the auditorium for sessions that were supposedly sold out; and having to go through airport style security at the National Gallery because someone assumed that the Olympics is going to make terrorist want to blow up a lot of paintings.

But I've tried to ditch it. I was genuinely interested in the opening ceremony, and my only complaint was that it went on so late that I fell asleep during Seb Coe's speech and missed the climax. And yesterday I watched a lot of sport - hours of cycling, some of the gymnastics, women's basketball, a bit of swimming and a couple of bouts of boxing. It's all stuff in which I would never usually have any interest, but because it's such a big event for London I've got a mild compulsion to sit in front of the TV and watch the exertions.

I suspect it is having a similar effect on a lot of people. The Olympics always draws a lot of attention, but it's even more so this time because it's in the UK, so we're watching sport that we've never watched before and will probably never watch again.

It provides a holiday for our minds, a break from our usual interests that will have us engrossed for a couple of weeks; and when it's over we'll go back to taking no interest in all 90% of the sports on show. But we should feel a bit better for it … as long as Team GB picks up a few medals.

Mark Say's collection of fiction, Perversities of Faith, is available on amazon.co.uk and amazon.com. Also check out marksaywriter.com.

What they didn't tell us to expect about the Olympics

The mood around the Olympics has turned quite unpleasant over the past few days.

We've already heard loud complaints over the pricing of tickets and the messy allocation process, and the way draconian rules are being enforced to stay sweet with the corporate sponsors. It's prompted a lot of us in London to think that we ought to just forget the games are taking place in our city and concentrate on the events on TV.

But it's becoming hard to take that attitude. We're being bombarded with messages from Transport for London to expect a couple of weeks of chaos, long waits and crowded trains and buses. There are indications that people are going to be herded around the transport hubs like cattle entering an abattoir. Markings are appearing on roads to tell cars, buses and taxis to stay out of the empty lanes, which are reserved for officials whizzing between events.

People going to the Olympic Park are being told to expect the type of waits they would expect at airport security. Parts of London will be flooded with uniforms, a lot of them military. We can expect a makeshift army camp in the East End and they've placed missiles on top of a block of flats.

I don't recall any warnings about all this when London was bidding for the games, or when it won them back in 2005. I do recall a bunch of politicians and sporting bigwigs telling us how great it would be for the city, regenerate a swathe of East London and give us a couple of weeks in which admiring eyes would be on us from all over the world. But none of them told us the price for the people who live here (and that's without the big increase in the cost of staging the Games).

I can't help thinking that if all this had been brought up in 2003-04 there would have been a lot more opposition to London even trying to get the Games, probably enough to wreck our chances in the bidding process. And now we would all be having a laugh at the prospect of Paris being messed up for a month.

Mark Say's collection of fiction, Perversities of Faith, is available on amazon.co.uk and amazon.com. Also check out www.marksaywriter.com.

No, I don't like the Shard

I've watched the Shard go up over the past four years. It's been a major irritation, as it made the traffic south of London Bridge even worse and caused me a lot of time extra time sitting on buses. So it's hard for me to feel like cheering at its official opening this week, whatever Boris Johnson, Ken Livingstone or a bunch of architectural critics tell us.

I will give it its due for being impressive from a distance. It's sleek, shiny and would add something stunning to another skyline. It would look great at Canary Wharf, or on a big brownfield site with hundreds of square yards free around its base

But from close up it's an ungainly imposition. It's unsympathetic to its neighbouring buildings, it wipes out the sunlight in surrounding streets, and its footprint squeezes the life out of the pavements. The area is already crowded, with Guy's Hospital, London Bridge Station and a couple of big tourist attractions drawing in the hordes, and when the the Shard is in full use there will be thousands more people jostling space. It's going to be pretty horrible, and if they ever have to evacuate the building it's likely to create hours of gridlock in a big swathe of South London.

It's a bad building for its location, and is going to be a source of daily aggravation for thousands of people who live and work in the area. But the people who paid for it, built it and allowed the work to go ahead won't be among those who have to put up with the inconvenience, they can gratify their egos and make money from the building, and that's what matters.

It's how things work and I'm too cynical to think things are going to change, but I still get very angry when the buggers tell us we should be grateful.

Mark Say's collection of fiction, Perversities of Faith, is available on amazon.co.uk and amazon.com. Also check out www.marksaywriter.com.